I try to tell myself 
My passivity is my Piscean sign
Pisces is why I am quiet.
Pisces is why I am a pacifist.
But it - I - crossed
That line long ago,
Back when I red-eyed,
Back when the stomach aches started.
Back where my head filled with ice, 
A wall went up between me
And my humanity - sanity -
I sunk into the waters in my soul, 
The ice froze over.
Now I’m left hanging on the ice,
Trying to retrieve my sanity, my humanity.
A sun passed my darkness
And melted some of [the] ice,
I rose above the numbing water, 
And took my first breath in four years,
But the earth turned and the sun
Grew afraid of my darkness
And left when I was in reach
Of rising from this icy prison.
I am passive because my real soul
Glows above me,
A demon breathing cold
Onto my heart and senses.